The Senior-Faculty basketball game was a complete and utter failure for the Senior squad. Armed in colorful, vintage NBA jerseys, armbands, bright shoes, headbands, and even a Belmont Hill kippah, the team lacked all forms of basketball skill. This is perhaps best exemplified by the 0/2 performance from three by the very writer of this article.
The faculty, on the other hand, displayed a star-studded lineup. Mr. Cofield and Mr. Pitcher are each taller than the entire First Form stacked vertically, and the beastliness of Mr. Messina and Mr. LaLiberte ’14 could not be matched by the seniors, who had no Varsity athletes on the Basketball squad this winter. On the other hand, however, both Mr. Glenn “Unc(le)” Harvey and Mr. Bracken ’15 put on dismal performances.
The Class of 2026 started the game off strong as Eli Warn ’26 splashed a three from the corner to get the guys on the board. Shortly thereafter, though, a string of airballs and bricks began that is truly inexplicable. Over and over again, the seniors hucked up shots from range, missing just about every single one. While I wasn’t able to consult any sort of official score or stat line, Warn described the situation as “Awful. Truly awful…it was the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to me.” I proceeded to airball a three (I made one in warmups, I swear), and I felt a form of despair I haven’t felt before.
The faculty used their size to their advantage, consistently driving to the rim and picking up crucial offensive and defensive boards. The seniors’ poor shooting from range was no match for the faculty posting up in the paint.
While the seniors got nowhere close to beating the faculty, the team had an amazing experience on the court and bench, one that every non-Senior should look forward to. Hopefully, the students will be able to best the faculty team in a proposed softball game this fall! Last, the whole squad extends a massive thank you to the professional refs who put up with our shenanigans, even though their calls clearly biased the faculty.